Finding the proper wedding attire for guests of the bride or groom is often a fashion conundrum.
You want to be the envy of your stylish gaggle of girlfriends in the latest designer frock, but you do not want to upstage the blushing bride on her wedding day intentionally.
Here’s how to answer the dreaded and age-old question, “What should women wear to a wedding?”
1If the wedding requires “Formal White Tie” wedding attire
Break out your ball gown and dust off your jewel-encrusted Giuseppe Zanottis; you are going to an evening wedding party.
What is the wedding attire fashion code?
Think White House Dinner with the President and Mrs. O.
A woman should wear a gown that is floor length to a formal evening wedding.
No need to wear white gloves, (unless you are just fabulous) but your best accessories, smoky-eyed featured makeup and diamond jewelry should make an appearance at this formal wedding reception.
But remember: No tea length or short dresses allowed.
- What about the fellas? Men will wear tuxedos with white tie and often tails.
2If the wedding requires “Black Tie” wedding attire
Black tie wedding attire indicates that the wedding will remain formal but Cinderella-ball gown dresses are not required.
A woman will have to wear a dress that grazes the floor or is at least mid-calf length.
Glitz and glamour is not optional at a black tie wedding, so pump up the volume with an amazing cocktail dress adorned with sparkle and shine and killer evening shoes.
If you need more clues as to what wedding attire is perfect for the Black Tie wedding, tune into the Oscars and Emmys for style hints.
- What about the fellas? Men will wear dark tuxedos with bow ties or standard-length ties with a Windsor knot.
3If the wedding requires “Formal or Black Tie Optional” wedding attire
When you read the words ‘Formal or Black Tie Optional” the bride is telling you that the evening wedding is dressy but a floor-length sequined gown is optional.
Female wedding guests of the bride and groom should wear long dresses but choose a dress that is a step above your favorite “paint-the-town-red” cocktail dress.
- What about the fellas? Just like the Black Tie wedding attire mentioned above: Men will wear dark tuxedos with bow ties or standard-length ties with a Windsor knot.
4If the wedding requires “Dressy Casual or Semiformal” wedding attire
Dressy casual or Semiformal wedding attire allows the wedding guest more sartorial options.
You can wear a riveting, but not too revealing, cocktail dress for an evening wedding or a bold floral strapless ensemble–paired with a magnificent colored straw dress hat–for a summer morning wedding.
No flat sandals or ballet flats allowed at a semiformal or dressy casual wedding reception (even if it lasts long into the wee hours) only your best shoes, strappy sandals and glam pumps will do.
- What about the fellas? Finally, men are released from the grasp of the boring dark tuxedo for their wedding attire. However, a suit and a tie are still required wedding wardrobe options for men.
5If the wedding requires “Casual” wedding attire for women
Casual wedding attire gives the well-dress woman a plethora of fashion possibilities.
To prevent wearing the wrong dress or pantsuit, ask yourself three questions:
- What would the bride wear if she were a wedding guest?
- What dress or outfit do I usually select for special events and weddings?
- What is the location and time of the event?
By answering these three questions, you will always be appropriate whether the wedding is on the beach in Jamaica or in the backyard of your Grandparents’ grand estate.
If you still need fashion tips, a simple knee-length black dress in a sumptuous fabric, or a classic linen shift or sheath in silk or wool crepe for spring or summer is always appropriate and elegant.
Still clueless? (Think first impression attire for a first date or the introductory meeting with your man’s parents.)
- What about the fellas? Casual wedding attire for men includes a pair of dress pants and a casual shirt or a dark or light colored suit without the tie.
Because wedding invitations have cryptic code words like” Black Tie Optional” and” Dressy Casual” the well-dressed woman needs a fashion cheat sheet to determine what to wear to a wedding.
Before you grab your plastic AMEX to shop for the perfect dress for wedding guests this season, use this wedding attire guide to get gorgeous…whether you are poised to catch the bridal bouquet or not.
planning wedding
July 4, 2009Thanks for this. I went to a wedding and stole the show and I felt bad ( still am).
randi
July 17, 2009Weddings are momentous and are significant to people who are bound for each other. Wedding accesories, like cufflinks, are part of weddings’ art and elegance. When done out of love, weddings are just so hard to forget.
Jamaica Wedding
July 21, 2009Just as the author say it really depends on the theme of wedding. If it formal then dress appropriately. In Jamaica most people tend to appreciate the traditional wedding format. Therefore casual attire would be a definite no no. However many of our nuptial visitors tend to be more flexible, open minded and adventurous. If you are planning a Jamaica wedding feel secure we will accommodate your needs.
toni burroughs
July 24, 2009I would like to know it is ok for a young teen to wear a strapless red dress to an evening summer wedding. Thank you, Toni Burroughs
Women's Designer Clothing Editor
August 16, 2009Toni,
It depends on the age of the teen and the cut of the dress. If my daughter was closer to seventeen, than thirteen than she could wear a strapless dress. If she’s a pre-teen or early teen (between the ages of 11 to 15) than a dress with thin spaghetti straps is more appropriate. Also take in consideration the size of her bust. If she is well-developed, a strapless dress with a small shawl or bolero jacket draped around her arms, could ease any discomfort you have as a mom.
Thanks for asking this great question!
Mechele
Women's Dresses
August 21, 2009Thanks for this very useful info. Finally someone has given clear definitions of what these different requirements really mean…so we can all avoid the panic and embarassment. At what point are dressy trousers acceptable?
Attending wedding
June 14, 2010I will be attending a summer wedding in the evening…(will be very hot and humid!) I want to know if there are pictures of any dresses so I could get an idea of what to where. And also if there is something that will help keep me cool without being to revealing. The wedding is probably going to be formal or semi-formal, if that helps for idea’s either? Thanks!
Women's Designer Clothing Editor
June 14, 2010Dear Attending Wedding,
As the summer wedding season is right around the corner, this is a great question. Check back later in the week, and I will post pictures of summer styles (cocktail dresses, semi-formal and formal dresses) that are appropriate for hot and humid weather.
Mechele
Val Durfee
July 23, 2010I am the girlfriend of the groom. The wedding will be formal but I’m not sure how formal I should go. I’m not part of the wedding party, so don’t think I should look like I am. However I don’t want to look out of place on my boyfriend’s arm while he’s in his tux. Ideas?
Glynne
July 30, 2010Hi! I will be attending my cousin’s wedding towards the end of October..It’s a semi-formal/formal wedding, but it’s at 4:oo in the afternoon and it’s an outside wedding in Florida. It’s not a beach wedding, but I kinda have mixed feelings about what I would think is appropriate so I needed your help! Any advice would be appreciated! Thanks!
Paula
August 9, 2010Would if be acceptable for the 65 yrs. young aunt of the groom to wear a dressy chiffon top and coordinating chiffon pants to a 4:30 wedding at a fancy hotel at the beach in California in early October? The invitation didn’t state the dress type. Thanks.
Julie
February 23, 2011I wish to see more dresses one can wear at a wedding who is not the bride! I need more info on what I can wear at a Spring wedding in March
sharon
June 10, 2011I am going to a 10:30 a.m. wedding. Would it be acceptable for 60 yr. young Step Mother-In-Law to wear a simple short black dress to the wedding? The wedding is going to be in a theater and I do not know anything about what the wedding party will be wearing. Should I wear sheer black hose with my heels since my legs are very white?
Barry Maish
July 4, 2011Hello,
Really nice article. Pant suits are also a good alternative to wear at wedding. Pant suits are more comfortable, stylish and quite flattering.
Kendall
September 14, 2011I’m 18 years old and going to my dad’s wedding in october. I’m not in the wedding party and have no clue what I should wear. Its a 3 pm indoor wedding and I would like to wear a dress, but don’t know what kind is appropriate. Any suggestions?
jaylynn
February 9, 2012I am going to a black-tie optional wedding. I have somewhat heavy arms – is it ok to wear a bolero jacket – it is black and taffeta looking. My dress is a black and tan pattern knee length dress with a rounded v-neck. If it matters, I am late 40’s.
Thanks
jaylynn
February 9, 2012I am attending a black-tie optional wedding, is it OK to wear a taffeta looking black bolero jacket? I have heavy arms and am self conscious about them. My dress is black, tan and cream and it looks OK with the jacket. I am in my late 40’s and am a fringe guest (business person of the brides father), I just don’t want to appear too out dated.
Thanks!